The Golden Globes are kiiiiiind of a joke, right? I mean, their insistence on dividing films into Drama and Musical or Comedy is pretty nutty, especially when films like American Hustle and The Wolf of Wall Street end up in the latter column. Totally bizarre. But the show never fails to deliver when it comes to drunk acceptance speeches (I’m looking at you, Jacqueline Bisset) and great jokes from hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.
I have to admit, though. This year, the Golden Globes got most of the awards right. Let’s see who won, and if it was (in my opinion) the right choice. A quick note before we start: I have not yet seen all of the big movies nominated this year, namely Her and The Wolf of Wall Street. So, take my opinions with that in consideration.
Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Jacqueline Bisset, Dancing on the Edge
Janet McTeer, The White Queen
Hayden Panettiere, Nashville
Monica Potter, Parenthood
Sofia Vergara, Modern Family
I have no idea what Dancing on the Edge is, and I would’ve loved to see Monica Potter and Parenthood get some recognition, but I did appreciate how totally wasted Jacqueline Bisset was during her thank yous.
Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Josh Charles, The Good Wife
Rob Lowe, Behind the Candelabra
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
Corey Stoll, House of Cards
Jon Voight, Ray Donovan
NOPE. Should have been Aaron Paul….bitch!
Best Performance by an Actress In A Mini-series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Helena Bonham Carter, Burton and Taylor
Rebecca Ferguson, The White Queen
Jessica Lange, American Horror Story: Coven
Helen Mirren, Phil Spector
Elisabeth Moss, Top of the Lake
I would have been happy with Jessica Lange, because duh, but Top of the Lake was fantastic and Elizabeth Moss completely killed it. If you haven’t seen it yet, check it out on Netflix and be prepared to be traumatized for at least a week. This win was very much deserved. Plus, she give the Mani-Cam the bird on the red carpet. She should get an extra trophy just for that.
Best Performance by an Actor in a Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Matt Damon, Behind The Candelabra
Michael Douglas, Behind The Candelabra
Chiwetel Ejiofor, Dancing on the Edge
Idris Elba, Luther
Al Pacino, Phil Spector
I didn’t watch Behind the Candelabra yet (but it’s On Demand right now, so I’m totally going to) but I heard it’s great. So sure, give it to Michael.
Best Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made for Television
American Horror Story: Coven
Behind The Candelabra
Dancing on the Edge
Top of the Lake
The White Queen
*Shrug* Again, I didn’t see it. Would like to see American Horror Story get some more award love eventually, but I have no problem with this winning.
Best Performance by an Actress In A Television Series, Comedy Or Musical
Zooey Deschanel, New Girl
Lena Dunham, Girls
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Veep
Amy Poehler, Parks And Recreation
I am thrilled that Amy Poehler won. It’s about time. Also her bit with Bono before her speech was pretty cute.
Best Performance by an Actor In A Television Series, Comedy Or Musical
Jason Bateman, Arrested Development
Don Cheadle, House of Lies
Michael J. Fox, The Michael J. Fox Show
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
Andy Samberg, Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Well, I wanted Jason Bateman to win, but at least he didn’t lose to the stupid Big Bang Theory, because ugh. I was expecting Jim Parsons to take it. Not that I don’t appreciate Jim Parsons – I do – but I do not appreciate his stupid show.
Best Television Series, Comedy Or Musical
The Big Bang Theory
Parks and Recreation
I still hold firmly that Girls is not a comedy. That being said, I suppose I will have to check out Brooklyn Nine-Nine, huh? This was definitely a surprise win. I’m glad Modern Family didn’t get it again, though I wanted Parks to take it.
Best Performance by an Actress In A Television Series, Drama
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Tatiana Maslany, Orphan Black
Taylor Schilling, Orange is the New Black
Kerry Washington, Scandal
Robin Wright, House of Cards
I haven’t had a chance to check out House of Cards, but I’m going to call bullsh*t on this one. I am sure Robin Wright is great and all, but does she play a half dozen characters who look identical, but manage to all have unique personas? I don’t think she does. Tatiana Maslany was robbed.
Best Performance by an Actor In A Television Series, Drama
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Liev Schreiber, Ray Donovan
Michael Sheen, Masters of Sex
Kevin Spacey, House of Cards
James Spader, The Blacklist
Best Television Series, Drama
The Good Wife
House of Cards
Masters of Sex
Basically, if Breaking Bad hadn’t won, there would have been riots. Like, full-on riots. The obvious choice.
Best Foreign Language Film
Blue is the Warmest Color
The Great Beauty
The Wind Rises
The only foreign movie I’ve heard any buzz about this year is the NC-17 rated Blue is the Warmest Color, but I don’t have enough knowledge about the films in this category to make a judgement.
Best Animated Film
Despicable Me 2
WTF is The Croods? Despicable Me 2 was great, but Frozen was the clear winner here.
Best Original Song, Motion Picture
“Atlas,” Catching Fire
“Let It Go,” Frozen
“Ordinary Love,” Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom
“Please, Mr. Kennedy,” Inside Llewyn Davis
“Sweeter Than Fiction,” One Chance
The only song on this list I’ve heard is “Let It Go,” so I cannot judge, but I can judge the fact that Bono wore hideous purple-tinted sunglasses all night.
Best Original Score, Motion Picture
All is Lost, Alex Ebert
Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom, Alex Heffes
12 Years a Slave, Hans Zimmer
The Book Thief, John Williams
Gravity, Steven Price
Sure, why not?
Best Screenplay, Motion Picture
12 Years a Slave, John Ridley
American Hustle, Eric Singer, David O. Russell
Her, Spike Jonze
Nebraska, Bob Nelson
Philomena, Steve Coogan and Jeff Pope
From what I’ve heard about Her, and what I know about Spike Jonze, this was probably the right choice. I would have totally been happy with David O. Russell, though.
Best Director, Motion Picture
Alfonso Cuarón, Gravity
Paul Greengrass, Captain Phillips
Steve McQueen, 12 Years a Slave
Alexander Payne, Nebraska
David O. Russell, American Hustle
I’m going to make a confession: I thought Gravity was only so-so. Visually, yes, it was stunning. But the story was trite and Sandra Bullock has been way better in other films. Clooney totally phoned it in. It was just okay for me. But if it’s going to win anything, Best Director makes sense.
Best Performance by an Actress In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Sally Hawkins, Blue Jasmine
Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle
Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years a Slave
Julia Roberts, August: Osage County
June Squibb, Nebraska
This is one of those weird categories where I think several people are equally deserving. Jennifer Lawrence was amazing as always, but Julia Roberts really blew me away and, of course, Lupita Nyong’o gave one of the most emotionally heartbreaking performances of the year. I wish more than one person could’ve won.
Best Performance by an Actor In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Barkhad Abdi, Captain Phillips
Daniel Brühl, Rush
Bradley Cooper, American Hustle
Michael Fassbender, 12 Years a Slave
Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club
Jared Leto 100% deserved this win, but again, I wish it could’ve gone to Bradley Cooper and Michael Fassbender as well.
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Comedy Or Musical
Christian Bale, American Hustle
Bruce Dern, Nebraska
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street
Oscar Isaac, Inside Llewyn Davis
Joaquin Phoenix, Her
I am genuinely surprised that Joaquin Phoenix didn’t win, but maybe this is the push Leo needs to finally get that Oscar. Besides, if Leo hadn’t won, we wouldn’t have gotten to see the very best exchange of the evening. Seriously, that thumbs up he gives? Priceless.
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Comedy Or Musical
Amy Adams, American Hustle
Julie Delpy, Before Midnight
Greta Gerwig, Frances Ha
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Enough Said
Meryl Streep, August: Osage County
What a ridiculous set of nominations. Meryl Streep’s role was the least comedic thing about that movie. Drug addicts who are dying of cancer? HILARIOUS. Whatever. Amy Adams totally deserved to win, even though American Hustle is also not a comedy.
Best Motion Picture, Comedy Or Musical
Inside Llewyn Davis
The Wolf of Wall Street
Say it with me now: none of these are comedies or musicals. No, I will not get over it. That being said, American Hustle is the best non-comedic comedy I’ve seen all year.
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama
Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine
Sandra Bullock, Gravity
Judi Dench, Philomena
Emma Thompson, Saving Mr. Banks
Kate Winslet, Labor Day
I loved (LOVED) Blue Jasmine and thought Cate Blanchett was perfect. This is a deserved win.
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama
Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years a Slave
Idris Elba, Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
Tom Hanks, Captain Phillips
Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club
Robert Redford, All Is Lost
I wouldn’t have argued if Chiwetel Ejiofor had won instead, but Matthew McConaughey was truly amazing in Dallas Buyers Club. Since when is he a Real Actor? I have no idea. But he gave one of the most honest performances I’ve seen in a long time.
Best Motion Picture, Drama
12 Years a Slave
Out of these nominees, this was definitely the clear winner. What will be interesting is when these movies are combined with the “comedies” above – I think American Hustle might give 12 Years A Slave a run for its money.
What do you think? Did the Hollywood Foreign Press Association choose the right winners, or are you mad that someone got snubbed? What are your Oscar predictions? Sound off in the comments!