For a show that’s supposedly about the journey to find true love, The Bachelor can get kind of uncomfortable to watch. Last night’s show brought viewers the first round of dates, but the episode was far from romantic. In fact, it left me feeling a little uneasy about what these women are willing to go through for the attention of a man. Let’s count down the three most embarrassing and cringe-worthy moments and see who made it through.
3. After both Clare and Kat got solo dates with El Bachelor Juan Pablo, it was time for a group date. The “fun” activity was a photo shoot for Models N Mutts, an organization that raises money for animal adoption by having hot women pose with dogs or something. Each contestant was paired up with an adorable shelter dog and then had a themed photo session with the pup and Juan Pablo. Some wore bikinis, some wore pretty dresses, and then some…wore other stuff. Not sure why Chelsie and Kelly were chosen to look completely ridiculous, but I guess it’s for a good cause. I just hate when this show forces women to prove they are “good sports” (which basically means “not uptight”) and “willing to play along” (which basically means “do whatever it takes to keep dating him”). It’s really demeaning, no matter what the cause. Then again, with “dog lover” being Kelly’s only listed profession, I guess she had it coming. She got the date rose, by the way.
2. I’m not really sure what is happening in the photo above, but that wasn’t the worst part of this photo shoot. Some of the contestants were chosen to pose nude, with just small signs strategically placed to hide their naughty bits. Now, it seemed like the nude photos were chosen randomly, but it definitely felt like a way for production to stir the pot. The two contestants picked to bare it all were Andi and Elise – an Assistant District Attorney and first grade teacher, respectively. Hmmm. Considering those are two jobs where you could most certainly be fired for appearing nude – yes, even for charity – it seems kind of suspicious to me. And gross. Like, why do these women have to jeopardize their careers to prove that they’re “cool enough” to “play along”? I give props to Elise, who sneakily switched places with free spirit Lucy and got out of it altogether, but honestly. Why did she have to sneak? Why did Andi, a seemingly intelligent and professional woman, agree to do it? Why couldn’t they just tell Juan Pablo that they were seriously concerned about their job security. If a man is supposed to be marriage material, you’d think he’d encourage them to do whatever felt comfortable. But he sat there and convinced Andi to do it. Gross. I guess apparently they weren’t fully naked after all, but still. The whole thing left a bad taste in my mouth.
1. By far the most cringe-worthy part of last night’s Bachelor was Victoria’s drunken meltdown. For most of the group date, she seemed fine, but I guess while waiting for some one-on-one time with Juan Pablo, sister had one too many glasses of champagne. Because wow. Wow. Talk about drunk. Victoria was giving Katie a run for her money. Let’s see, she danced alone drunkenly in the hot tub. She slurred her way through an interview, giving great sound bites like, “If Juan Pablo just so happens to be mine, I’m gonna straddle him every day. ‘Cause that’s what life is about…straddling people…and things” and “I gave him the hymen maneuver. I saved his life. I should totally get a rose for that…If you do the hymen maneuver and somebody’s like, lying down and dying, you’re gonna have to straddle them.” Yes, she said hymen maneuver. Twice. Yes, she meant Heimlich maneuver, but she actually meant mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Good lord. Then she went to look for Juan Pablo, found him talking to another girl, and locked herself in the bathroom hysterically crying. After several people, including JP himself, tried to talk her down from the ledge, she demanded to go home. They shoved her in a cab and sent her to a hotel instead. The next day, Juan Pablo sent her packing because she wasn’t a good role model for his daughter, unlike the rest of the women who are willing to participate in this sh*tshow. Ugh. You can watch the entire mess below and see for yourself.
In the end, the forgettable Amy L and Chantal were left without roses. But hey, at least they didn’t go out like Victoria, who will forever be known as the Sloppy Drunken Meltdown Girl. What do you think – was Juan Pablo too hard on Victoria? Should Andi have backed out of the photo shoot? What exactly was Kelly supposed to be, a dog alien? Let me know in the comments!