The 2014 Emmy nominations were announced this morning by everyone’s dream BFF Mindy Kaling and Carson Daly (no one wants to be his friend, though). For the most part, I think this year’s nominees were just what everyone expected, with a few surprise snubs here and there. That’s not necessarily a good thing, though. I mean, they were so expected, I might call them lazy. Predictable. Snooze worthy. Breakout performances from niche shows like Hannibal or Orphan Black? Incredible writing from lower rated shows like The Americans? Screw ’em, let’s just nominate Homeland again. Ugh.
It seems like everyone agrees that Tatiana Maslany of Orphan Black was the biggest snub, though it didn’t really come as a surprise to me, because like I said, predictable. That was a disappointment I knew was coming. Of course, that didn’t stop hoards of Clone Club fans from hitting Twitter to express their rage, and soon #EmmyForMaslany was trending worldwide. The show’s official Twitter took the news like a pro, but certain clones did not.
Aaaanyway, let’s talk about those who did get a nomination. I’ll note my personal choice in italics, because italics are fancy.
Outstanding Drama Series
Game Of Thrones
House Of Cards
Yikes…my gut says Breaking Bad should win, because the final season was probably one of the best (if not the best) seasons of television ever. Everything about it was perfect. EVERYTHING. Then again, True Detective was such an amazing show,with such stunning writing and acting – not to mention how gorgeous it was visually. Not that the rest of these shows are anything to sneeze at, either. Except, okay, who keeps nominating Downton Abbey for stuff? Are we just trying to look sophisticated? Because I love the show and all, but last season was sub-par and certainly not comparable to the rest of these nominees. I’ve never even seen House Of Cards and I know it was better than last season of Downton. I’m just saying. At least Newsroom isn’t here again.
Missing: Hannibal, The Americans and I see a lot of people complaining about The Good Wife‘s absence as well. I’ve never seen it, but I’m surprised it isn’t there.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Jeff Daniels, Newsroom
Woody Harrelson, True Detective
Matthew McConaughey, True Detective
Jon Hamm, Mad Men
Kevin Spacey, House Of Cards
Dude, I am not even touching this one, because there’s no way I can decide between Woody, Matthew or Bryan. I feel sorry for voters.
Missing: Hugh Dancy for Hannibal and/or Matthew Rhys for The Americans, who should almost certainly be there instead of Jeff Daniels, am I right? (Yes, I am)
Outstanding Lead Actress In A Drama Series
Michelle Dockery, Downton Abbey
Claire Danes, Homeland
Robin Wright, House Of Cards
Kerry Washington, Scandal
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Lizzy Caplan, Masters Of Sex
Michelle Dockery? No. Just, no. I enjoyed Lizzy Caplan’s performance on Masters Of Sex, but I’ve never watched The Good Wife or House Of Cards, so I don’t know if I can make a fair choice here. Let’s just say Kerry Washington, because Olivia f*cking Pope, y’all.
Missing: Tatiana Maslany, duh. Also Keri Russell for The Americans should be here. So should Elizabeth Moss for Mad Men.
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Jon Voight, Ray Donovan
Peter Dinklage, Game Of Thrones
Mandy Patinkin, Homeland
Josh Charles, The Good Wife
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
Jim Carter, Downton Abbey
Again with the totally ridiculous Downton Abbey nomination. Sorry Mister Carson. This one is 100 percent Peter Dinklage, though. He was outstanding in Game Of Thrones this season. I love Aaron Paul, but Peter tops even him this time around.
Missing: Jeff Perry, who plays Cyrus Beene on Scandal. He had an amazing year. Also, it was definitely a mistake to enter Mads Mikkelsen of Hannibal as a lead actor. He could’ve killed in this category, no pun intended. (Okay, pun intended)
Runners up for missing: A number of other actors from Game Of Thrones could’ve made the cut, including Charles Dance (Tywin Lannister), Kit Harington (Jon Snow) and Nikolaj Coster (Jaime Lannister). It would’ve been nice to see Dean Norris get a nomination for Breaking Bad as well.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Anna Gunn, Breaking Bad
Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey
Lena Headey, Game Of Thrones
Christine Baranski, The Good Wife
Christina Hendricks, Mad Men
Joanne Froggatt, Downton Abbey
Anna Gunn positively nailed every scene in the final season of Breaking Bad, though I am thrilled for Lena Headey, who completely deserves her nomination. All the Lannisters were quite remarkable this year. As for the rest of them? Well, Maggie Smith is just perfect always, but I don’t know if she needs to be here. Joanne Froggatt? NOPE. And I love me some Joan, but Christina Hendricks was in Mad Men for like, five minutes this season.
Missing: Bellamy Young of Scandal, because Mellie outshines every person on that show. Also Betsey Brandt (Marie on Breaking Bad) should be here over several of the actual nominees.
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Drama Series
Paul Giamatti, Downton Abbey
Dylan Baker, The Good Wife
Reg E. Cathey, House Of Cards
Robert Morse, Mad Men
Joe Morton, Scandal
Beau Bridges, Masters of Sex
Both Joe Morton (Papa Pope!) and Robert Morse were great, but I was very moved by Beau Bridges’ performance on Masters Of Sex. Absolutely heartbreaking. Paul Giamatti was in Downton Abbey for like, three scenes and they weren’t very impressive. Give me a break.
Missing: Pedro Pascal should’ve been a shoo-in for his performance as Prince Oberyn Martell on Game Of Thrones. God, it’s like – spoiler alert – getting your head squished in by The Mountain all over again.
Runner-up for missing: Ben Feldman (Ginsberg on Mad Men)
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Drama Series
Margo Martindale, The Americans
Diana Rigg, Game Of Thrones
Kate Mara, House Of Cards
Allison Janney, Masters of Sex
Jane Fonda, The Newsroom
Kate Burton, Scandal
Scandal is getting so much love this year, it actually makes me more annoyed at the lack of a Bellamy Young nomination. Also weird: Margo Martindale is wonderful, but Claudia was only in a handful of scenes this on this season of The Americans. Why her and not the main cast? Oh well. Having never seen House Of Cards, I’m going to put my vote in for Allison Janney as Guest Actress. She made me cry like an idiot, because of course she did.
Missing: Gillian Anderson as Dr. Bedelia Du Maurier on Hannibal.
Outstanding Comedy Series
The Big Bang Theory
Orange Is The New Black
I think Veep is the funniest show on television, hands down. I also think Orange Is The New Black is incredible. It’s like apples and oranges, so I’d be happy with either win. The Emmys really needs a Dramady category, ya know? Also, time to quit it with Modern Family, guys. Move on.
Missing: Parks and Recreation, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Broad City
Outstanding Lead Actor In A Comedy Series
Louis C.K., Louie
Don Cheadle, House of Lies
Matt LeBlanc, Episodes
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
William H. Macy, Shameless
Ricky Gervais, Derek
WTF is this category, I mean seriously. William H. Macy probably deserves an Emmy for his work on Shameless, but there’s nothing funny about it. I knew Jim Parsons would be here, but I cannot stand The Big Bang Theory. Does anyone even watch the rest of these? Are they even good?
Missing: ANY male actor who submitted from Parks and Recreation or Brooklyn Nine-Nine – or hell even Modern Family. Chris Messina from The Mindy Project. My dad, who is funnier than most of these guys.
Outstanding Lead Actress In A Comedy Series
Lena Dunham, Girls
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Veep
Melissa McCarthy, Mike & Molly
Taylor Schilling, Orange Is The New Black
I would be very happy if Amy Poehler finally got the recognition she deserves at some point, but there is no way anyone should get this other than Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
Missing: Mindy Kaling for The Mindy Project. Ilana Glazer and/or Abbi Jacobson for Broad City. Amy Schumer for Inside Amy Schumer. (But JLD should still win)
Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series
Adam Driver, Girls
Jessie Tyler Ferguson, Modern Family
Fred Armisen, Portlandia
Ty Burrell, Modern Family
Tony Hale, Veep
Andre Braugher, Brooklyn Nine-Nine
I love everything about Brooklyn Nine-Nine, but I just might love Andre Braugher the most. I would also be okay with Tony Hale or Adam Driver, though.
Missing: Reid Scott had a standout year on Veep.
Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series
Mayim Bialik, The Big Bang Theory
Julie Bowen, Modern Family
Anna Chlumsky, Veep
Allison Janney, Mom
Kate McKinnon, Saturday Night Live
Kate Mulgrew, Orange Is The New Black
Ugh, it’s that darn dramedy problem again. I really cannot choose between Red and Amy Brookheimer, please don’t make me.
Missing: Zosia Mamet is still the funniest thing on Girls.
Outstanding Guest Actor In A Comedy Series
Bob Newhart, Big Bang Theory
Nathan Lane, Modern Family
Steve Buscemi, Portlandia
Jimmy Fallon, Saturday Night Live
Gary Cole, Veep
Louis C.K., Saturday Night Live
I’m not particularly passionate about this category, but Gary Cole is great on Veep.
Outstanding Guest Actress In A Comedy Series
Natasha Lyonne, Orange Is The New Black
Uzo Aduba, Orange Is The New Black
Laverne Cox, Orange Is The New Black
Tina Fey, Saturday Night Live
Melissa McCarthy, Saturday Night Live
Joan Cusack, Shameless
Okay, so there is literally nothing funny about Uzo Abuda’s “Crazy Eyes” on Orange Is The New Black, but that woman needs an Emmy. She is perfection. PERFECTION. Also very thrilled for the rest of the OITNB nominations. Apparently these nominations are for season one, not season two, by the way.
Missing: I know there’s already plenty of OITNB love, but Yael Stone, who plays Lorna Morello, should be there, too.
American Horror Story: Coven
Bonnie & Clyde
The White Queen
My vote would normally go to American Horror Story, which is one of my favorite shows, but Fargo was one of the most brilliant TV shows of the year.
Missing: Nothing, this should go to Fargo.
Outstanding Television Movie
The Normal Heart
The Trip to Bountiful
Sherlock: His Last Vow
Muhammad Ali’s Greatest Fight
I think this one is a given, no?
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Miniseries or TV Movie
Chiwetel Ejiofor, Dancing on the Edge
Mark Ruffalo, The Normal Heart
Billy Bob Thornton, Fargo
Benedict Cumberbatch, Sherlock: His Last Vow
Idris Elba, Luther
Martin Freeman, Fargo
Yikes, what a category. I’m going to go with Billy Bob Thornton, because Lorne Malvo was absolutely terrifying, but there are probably several people here who deserve to win.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Miniseries or TV Movie
Cicely Tyson, The Trip to Bountiful
Jessica Lange, American Horror Story: Coven
Sarah Paulson, American Horror Story: Coven
Kristen Wiig, Spoils of Babylon
Helena Bonham Carter, Burton and Taylor
Minnie Driver, Return to Zero
The funny thing is, I really felt like Sarah Paulson deserved an Emmy for American Horror Story: Asylum. I thought it was a lot more powerful than her role in Coven. Oh well. Supreme Fiona forever.
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or TV Movie
Colin Hanks, Fargo
Jim Parsons, The Normal Heart
Joe Mantello, The Normal Heart
Alfred Molina, The Normal Heart
Matt Bomer, The Normal Heart
Martin Freeman, Sherlock
So…The Normal Heart, huh. I’m going to be contrary and cast my vote for Colin Hanks. He was really, really impressive on Fargo.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or TV Movie
Frances Conroy, American Horror Story
Kathy Bates, American Horror Story
Angela Bassett, American Horror Story
Alison Tolman, Fargo
Ellen Burstyn, Flowers in the Attic
Julia Roberts, The Normal Heart
Why is Alison Tolman nominated as supporting? Weird. If she doesn’t get this, I’d love anyone from AHS: Coven to get the award. Especially Frances Conroy. BALENCIAGAAAAAAAA.
Outstanding Variety Series
The Colbert Report
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Live Real Time with Bill Maher
Saturday Night Live
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
Honestly though, anyone but Jimmy Kimmel.
Outstanding Reality – Competition
The Amazing Race
Dancing With the Stars
So You Think You Can Dance?
So this is probably going to go to The Amazing Race but I still think Top Chef is a great show, even though it’s declined in recent years.
Missing: RuPaul’s Drag Race seems like it should be here, no?
Outstanding Host for a Reality or Reality-Competition
Betty White, Betty White’s Off Their Rockers
Tom Bergeron, Dancing With the Stars
Tim Gunn and Heidi Klum, Project Runway
Cat Deeley, So You Think You Can Dance
Anthony Bourdain, The Taste
Jane Lynch, Hollywood Game Night
Every year, I say that Cat Deeley deserves an Emmy. EVERY YEAR.
Missing: Chris Harrison has devoted his life to The Journey To Love™ on The Bachelor/Bachelorette, guys. Give him some credit.
And finally, just because I like this category…
Derek Hough, Dancing With the Stars
Tabitha Dumo and Napoleon Dumo, So You Think You Can Dance
Travis Wall, So You Think You Can Dance
Mandy Moore, So You Think You Can Dance
Christopher Scott, So You Think You Can Dance
I would also be okay with Nappy-Tabs, who choreographed my favorite hip hop routine ever last season, or Christopher Scott, because duh. I think Mandy Moore is kind of overrated, though.
What do you think of this year’s Emmy nominations? Who are your favorites? What snub has you gnashing your teeth? Let me know in the comments!