Josh Taekman Is The Worst, Part II (Second Verse, Same As The First)

Source: Bravo TV
Source: Bravo TV

Let’s just come right out and say it: Josh Taekman is a monster. There’s nothing, literally nothing, redeeming about him – seriously, can you name something? Prove me wrong in the comments. This week on the Real Housewives of New York City, as Kristen looks at the camera with tears in her eyes and says, “He’s the love of my life,” I don’t know if I’ve ever felt more sorry for a person on TV. Sure, Kristen is a bit of a cry baby. She’s frighteningly insecure and leans too hard on other people for validation. She definitely suffers from self-victimization. And she’s kind of whiny. But when you think about how she’s been with Josh for ten years – a f*cking decade with this creep – well, it’s kind of clear that she’s been beaten down.

Let’s start at the beginning. I’ve already been through my feelings about Josh. Throughout this season of RHONY, he’s definitely shown his true colors (various shades of d*ckbag) and still, on this week’s episode, his behavior appalled me. I was actually kind of upset. Not because I love Kristen Taekman, or because I’m emotionally invested in her life, but because as a woman it’s actually stomach-turning to watch another woman be so disrespected by a man who is supposed to love her.

Source: Bravo TV
Source: Bravo TV

The word “entrepreneur” is thrown around a lot this week. Josh is an entrepreneur. If Kristen was an entrepreneur like Josh, she’d understand. That’s just how an entrepreneur thinks. Okay, fine. I know Josh Taekman is very successful and he probably has a ridiculously keen business sense. That’s great. Congrats to him on that achievement. But the thing is, he’s also committed himself to marriage. To fatherhood. To being part of a family. If that’s not something he’s willing to devote his attention to, well, he should be single. Lots of people prefer building a business to building a family – that’s fine! Just don’t get married. The problem for Josh is, he doesn’t seem to realize how marriage factors in to his entrepreneurial lifestyle. Remember when he dumped the kids on the in-laws for Labor Day weekend, because he’d rather go to the Hamptons and “network” than spend any time with his own children? Remember when he texted through an entire physical therapy session for his daughter? He’s willing to make those sacrifices, choosing business over family, but never the other way around. That’s a problem.

Kristen describes, while out on a double date with Heather and Jonathan, how Josh sold his marketing firm without any notice and moved them from New York to LA. Then, again without consulting Kristen, he rented out their LA house and said they needed to be out in 10 days – to move back to New York. Heather says, “Oh, that’s how an entrepreneur thinks.” Um. Okay. But that’s not how a partner thinks – and Josh is not only a businessman. He is a husband and a father. You cannot make decisions that impact the future of your wife and child without a moment’s consideration for how they might feel. You cannot ONLY be an entrepreneur.

Source: Bravo TV
Source: Bravo TV

This week, Kristen makes a small yet meaningful attempt to do something thoughtful for Josh: she cooks dinner. Now, because this supreme asshat has mentioned to her on multiple occasions how he’d come home more often if she ever made him dinner (lovely, isn’t he?), this is an actual statement. “See,” it says. “I’m trying. I cooked dinner, even though I don’t enjoy cooking.” (And can I just say that it’s also okay for a woman, a mother even, to not enjoy cooking? This does not make her a bad wife.) But time ticks on and, eventually, Josh is 30 minutes late. Kristen calls him to see where he is, and he’s a huge jerk about it. He’s late because a conference call ran long. Could he tell her he was running late? No. If she were ever in a conference room meeting with six people, having a heated discussion about Important Business Decisions, maybe she’d understand. But she’s just a dumbf*ck model and “mother” (fake job, obviously) so she doesn’t understand responsibility or hard work.

UGH. Okay, here’s the thing. I do not own my own company, nor would I call myself an “entrepreneur,” but I have actually been in a conference room with six people in a heated discussion. I’ve had conference calls run long, get rescheduled at the last minute or pop up unexpectedly. My job is actually pretty hectic that way. I get how it happens and I don’t think Josh was exaggerating about the circumstances. What he was exaggerating about was his inability to tell her he’d be late. In every single business meeting I’ve ever been in – and I’ve been in a lot – everyone has a laptop, a tablet and/or a cell phone. The conference, unless EBOOST is broke and running out of Josh’s car, was probably not on his cell phone. It was probably on a conference phone – which means he could easily text “running late sry,” and hit send without even pausing the meeting. It happens all the time. Technology is a beautiful thing that way. Multi-tasking, Josh. Embrace it.

Source: Bravo TV
Source: Bravo TV

The issue here was not Josh’s inability to call, or text, or email. The issue is that he just doesn’t give a f*ck. Kristen’s feelings are inconsequential to him. Yeah, she will probably “bust his balls” (as he charmingly puts it) for being late, but ultimately, nothing terrible will come from not calling. Because in Josh’s mind, Kristen’s hurt feelings are really not important. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t respect her and he doesn’t consider her feelings to be worth his time.

6 thoughts

  1. Fast forward five years from now. They will be divorced and not because she realizes what a brute he is but because in his warped mind’s eye she is not interesting or stimulating enough for him. He will end up divorcing her and leaving her for a younger, professional woman! You can almost see the writing on the wall! Very sad. Truly I would like someone to shake her and tell her to wake up!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sad thing is, you’re probably right. If they get divorced, he will be the one to leave. I don’t know if he would choose a professional woman, though. I feel like he needs to be able to look down on his wife and feel more important. I wish Heather would wake up and see how he treats her. She could maybe talk some sense into Kristen!


  2. Thanks so much, Josh, for “giving” Kristen boobs as YOUR anniversary present. Wow. You bet Josh will dump Kristen when her good looks (as the years pass) don’t outweigh his irritation. Kristen knew Josh would receive F’s as a husband/father before she married him and definitely before the kids. She chose her bed. Sad that the kids are stuck in that bed too. Now they are going to have to work through a bunch of abandonment issues. And Josh is sure to be as judgmental of them as he is of Kristen. Which is uglier??? – Josh “The Crypt Keeper’s” face or his attitude/personality? Josh treats Kristen as much like a door mat as Heather treats her husband so kind of the pot calling the kettle black when she confronted Heather. I also haven’t seen/heard anything about eboost except through the show….


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