The Oscars: Here Are My Choices, Let Me Know If I’m Right


As most of my close friends already know, I love awards season. I love watching all of the Best Picture nominees and getting outraged about snubs. I love cheering when my favorite wins and cursing the Academy when my favorite loses. I love opening monologues and spoofs of iconic scenes. I love Billy Crystal’s dumb songs and Ellen’s dumb selfies. I get pretty into it. I am passionate about film. I am still not over Pulp Fiction, to be honest. But in recent years, my interest in awards season – specifically the Oscars – has waned. I’m at the point now where I’m like:

Sure, I’ve still seen the majority of nominees. I still want to know what people are wearing. I am somewhat curious about the Birdman vs. Boyhood race, if you can even call it a race. But maybe that’s just it – there’s not much of a competition anymore, is there? The nominees are predictable, the winners even more so. True story: I will probably just watch The Walking Dead instead.

Despite this, I feel compelled to make my Oscar predictions, because I guess old habits die hard. So, here are my picks and predictions for tonight’s show. As you’ll see, my predictions and picks line up closely this year because, like I said, predictable.

Best Picture
The Imitation Game
The Theory of Everything
The Grand Budapest Hotel
American Sniper

Best Actress
Julianne Moore, Still Alice WINNER / MY PICK
Reese Witherspoon, Wild
Rosamund Pike, Gone Girl
Felicity Jones, The Theory of Everything
Marion Cotillard, Two Days, One Night

Best Actor
Michael Keaton, Birdman WINNER
Eddie Redmayne, The Theory of Everything MY PICK
Benedict Cumberbatch, The Imitation Game
Bradley Cooper, American Sniper

Best Supporting Actor 
J.K. Simmons, Whiplash WINNER / MY PICK
Edward Norton, Birdman
Ethan Hawke, Boyhood
Mark Ruffalo, Foxcatcher
Robert Duvall, The Judge

Best Supporting Actress
Patricia Arquette, Boyhood WINNER / MY PICK
Emma Stone, Birdman
Keira Knightley, The Imitation Game
Meryl Streep, Into the Woods
Laura Dern, Wild

Best Director
Richard Linklater, Boyhood WINNER / MY PICK
Alejandro González Iñárritu, Birdman
Wes Anderson, The Grand Budapest Hotel
Morten Tyldum, The Imitation Game
Bennett Miller, Foxcatcher

Best Adapted Screenplay
The Imitation Game
The Theory of Everything WINNER
Whiplash MY PICK
American Sniper
Inherent Vice

Best Original Screenplay
The Grand Budapest Hotel

I also predict:

  • Benedict Cumberbatch will photobomb someone, because now it’s expected of him.
  • Way too many women will wear those long, sheer maxi skirt-dress things that I hate.
  • Neil Patrick Harris will be alright, but he’ll be no Poehler/Fey.
  • Emma Stone will lose, but she’ll look adorable doing it.
  • Giuliana Rancic will say “mani-cam” about 900,000 times and everyone will hate her for it.
  • Mark Ruffalo will lose, but he will look like my dream husband doing it.
  • I will probably watch Girls and Looking, too. I really like Looking.

So, there you have it. Who will win? Who will lose? Will the jokes be good? Will someone’s speech make everyone cry? Will a white man win Best Actor? Oh wait, we already know that one. Will there be any actual big surprises? Any sweeps?

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